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Somethin' for the Kiddies....

Tuesday, March 06, 2007

A Small Smile...

So yesterday, I stopped to grab a coffee on my way to get my haircut (I enjoy it...pics to follow soon). There is a Starbucks inside my local grocery store. I pulled up next to this rough looking car. Inside the car was a woman in the drivers seat and a sleeping infant (looked about 3-4 months) in a car seat in the back. I didn't even really pay much attention as I hopped out, until I realized she was getting ready to smoke a cigarette. As I am entering the store, she and I looked at each other. I was thinking, "She better freakin' roll her window down." I have seen it a couple times and it KILLS me. Rolled up window, smoking parent in the front, babies or small children in the back seat. Ugh...I seriously want to "call someone" on them when I see it. In addition, there was a 5-ish year old little boy sitting next to her.
When I came back out with my coffee, we locked eyes again, and she was smoking now, but with the window almost rolled all the way down. She gave me a small smile and I smiled back. She looked really sad and I wondered what her story was. Obviously a mother, obviously having a rough life, not sure what she was waiting for at the grocery store parking lot...
So why do I tell this story? Because this mom struck me for some reason and I have been thinking about her today. I was thinking that this woman had no idea that I was also a mother..that here I was in my SUV, picking up a latte. What a snobby B---- I probably am. But she smiled at me. Maybe she wasn't making judgement. And I was relieved her window was down. It's still not o.k. to smoke around or near kids. It breaks my heart. But, maybe that was her one respite on a rough day. Maybe her parents smoked around her and she doesn't know anything different. I don't know what I am trying to say...I guess that, when you are a mother, you have some common ground with ALL mothers. I try to be understanding about different parenting styles (I could be better). I try to understand people's backgrounds, thoughts and views. When it comes down to it, I guess we are all just trying to be the best mothers we know how to be, however that looks to you. I kind of wanted her to know that even as I pulled away with my coffee, I know what "bad days" look like and days when you've lost your patience and days when there doesn't seem to be an end. Oh well...it was a moment and I am overthinking, as is typical me.

4 Comments:

At 1:55 PM, Blogger meg said...

Good one, good one...

 
At 2:08 PM, Blogger amanda said...

I totally understand what you were trying to say... well, at least I think I do. I've thought a lot about this kind of stuff since having Jack.

 
At 2:40 PM, Blogger Brown Eyed Girl said...

Ya know this could cut either way.

Either she smiled because she feels that common ground only we mothers can feel OR she thought you were the snobby you know what in the SUV and couldn't possibly understand her situation.

You're thinking you can on a Motherhood level. Chances are she's thinking financially. Maybe you can, maybe you can't.

Either way, I think thinking the positive from an experience like this is good.

She was having a rough day. You can sympathize with her. You exchanged a pleasantry. That's common ground.

 
At 3:00 PM, Blogger Kellie said...

I had a similar experience in the crackhouse not too long ago. I was making a judgment and then stopped to LOOK at the girl in front of me. Changed my opinion entirely.

Nice post...

 

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I'm a 39 year old stay-at-home mom. I have a 9 year old daughter and a 7 year old son. I have lived in the big city and in the mountains, but am happy to be back in the Midwest, raising the fam. I enjoy laughing, wine, bad karaoke, US Weekly, running, cemetaries, cheese sticks and short hair-dos. In my previous life, I was class-clown and a wanna-be comedian. In my professional life, I'm a journalism major with 10 years of marketing and PR experience. I dream of being a cast member on Saturday Night Live and working at Disney World as Snow White.

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