Awkward Parent Crap is a Total Party!

I have mentioned in the past that mother's are really hard on other mothers and that judging other parents seems to be a reflex among my peers. I am vvveerrryyy touchy about this. In fact, if I had a "hot button," I would say that is it. I try really hard not to participate in the catiness and also, have been a target of some judging myself. Probably more than I'll ever know. Anyway, it sucks. It's draining. It is probably my biggest pet peeve.
There is this whole "other side" of parenting a toddler that I like to call, "The parent's crap." I want to write a book about it..if I had money, time and a publishing deal handed to me that I didn't have to work for. Here's what happens: Your kid turns 2-ish...you start having play dates and play groups and various classes of sorts. You get to know these other mothers (sort of) and you hang out a lot with your kids. Well, two year olds aren't real good at the whole playing together thing. By nature, they are into the whole "me! me! me!" and "Mine! Mine! Mine!" and "No!" thing. This is their developmental M.O. They are learning how to play together, how to share, that there are others in the room with feelings, what is nice and not nice, etc. THIS IS THE LIFE OF A NORMAL 2 YEAR OLD!
Since this is the case, what develops are awkward moments among the parents. Parents will all different patience levels, parenting styles, etc. Pair that with new friends (other moms) you don't know like your high school or college lifelong friends and it is tough. No one feels comfortable saying, "Oh hi Sheila..we just met, but Joey just bopped Leo on the head...could you get him to stop?" or "Hey Darlene..I see you are sitting there glazed over, watching our two kids struggle over a toy while I nurse my newborn..could you get off your butt and maybe work that one out?" I am just saying..it isn't happening. Soooo...awkwardness ensues. Catty chatter after amongst parents...blah blah blah...I hate it. It is so lame.
I am not even writing this because this is happening to ME right now. I kind of went through this over the summer when Lucy was going through a hitting phase with a couple of kids. I felt terrible. I felt like some were watching how I handled it, and I felt like people didn't understand it and it SUCKED. Nothing feels worse to me, really. I just had to keep telling myself that it was all normal and a phase and worked on instituting a committed "Time Out" technique that seemed to work. I would get mad, however, because I felt like people would forget that kids are 2 and crap is going to happen like this and it's going to all work itself out over time! See what I mean...awkward and annoying crap.
Now, I see it happening with my friends, etc. and it is just painful. And no one talks about how hard it is to muddle through this phase from the parents point of view. There are the "terrible two's"...but then is the "parents crap" phase.
The good news is I am learning a lot about myself and others during this phase. Both good and bad. I think after year 2, they should give out badges of honor to parents who have survived. As I write this, I am thinking of my friends with 3 year olds who are nodding and chuckling and in their minds thinking, "Ahh..if she only knew what the 3's are all about." Ignorance is bliss, I say!!